Chronic emotional dysregulation refers to ongoing difficulty managing emotions: feelings rise quickly, become intense, and last longer than expected. With chronic emotional dysregulation, it’s hard to think clearly, control impulses, and respond in a way that’s aligned with what you want long-term.[1]
To help you understand chronic emotional dysregulation, on this page, we will explore:
As we’ve touched on, chronic emotional dysregulation means having ongoing difficulty managing emotional responses. It is sometimes called “emotional dysregulation disorder,” but it is important to note that it’s not usually a stand-alone diagnosis.
Instead, chronic emotional dysregulation is more often than not a pattern that appears alongside mental health conditions, including:
To better understand emotional dysregulation, we can look to what research says emotional regulation is. According to definitions, it involves noticing emotions, understanding them, accepting them, controlling impulses, and still being able to do what matters when upset.[1] When these skills are hard to access, we may be edging into chronic emotional dysregulation territory.
While chronic emotional dysregulation can feel isolating, it is not rare. Emotional dysregulation actually affects an average of 9.2% of adults. This is about one in every ten people.[2]
Interestingly, according to research, the rates of emotional dysregulation can vary across cultures. For instance, according to one study, Japan has the largest emotionally dysregulated group (over 12%), while Lithuania recorded the lowest (6%).[2]
It’s not as easy as saying certain groups of people are inherently less able to manage emotions. But we might consider how cultural expectations play a role in how people express and report emotional distress. For example, emotional suppression is often more socially acceptable in collectivist cultures because maintaining group harmony may be valued over openly expressing personal feelings.[3]
Another important point on emotional regulation problems across different cultures is that hiding emotions may not affect everyone in the same way. For example, emotional suppression is linked to poorer mental health in European American adults, but the same link isn’t found in Chinese adults.[4]
Further, a different study found that hiding feelings often made conversations feel less warm or connected. However, this effect was weaker among people who strongly followed Asian cultural values.[5] This suggests emotional habits (dysregulation in this instance) could cause more problems if they clash with the rules and expectations of the culture you are in.
Emotional dysregulation includes difficulties with impulse control, emotional clarity, acceptance of emotions, and goal-directed behavior when upset.[1] The following are descriptions of these signs to look out for, and examples of how they might manifest in day-to-day life.
Strong emotions create pressure to act really fast, even when you know deep down the reaction could cause problems. For example, after receiving criticism at work, you might send an angry email before giving yourself time to fully absorb, understand, and reason with what was said.
Maybe you are aware that you feel “bad,” but beyond that you find it hard to lock down the deeper layers of the feeling. For instance, you’re unsure if that bad feeling is rooted in anger, embarrassment, fear, hurt, and so on. So, in action, you might become very irritated with your partner without realizing you feel hurt.
Maybe you are someone who has had the message from a young age that some feelings are “unacceptable” or “shameful.” You might then criticize yourself for feeling things like jealousy or upset, for example, which can only add an extra layer of distress and weight to the emotion. This can apply quite heavily to men, who research finds may learn to view vulnerable feelings or seeking help as weakness.[6]
Dysregulated emotions can cause a sense of overwhelm so severe that it makes it hard to continue with ordinary life. You may find it hard to work, study, sleep, or complete simple tasks because your attention keeps returning to the upsetting event.
People who experience emotional regulation problems may understand a situation is not an emergency but still feel unable to reduce the emotional intensity of it.
Even once a problem has been resolved, someone with emotional regulation problems may continue to experience a reaction. You might experience this by:
These key signs of chronic emotional dysregulation are not about simply experiencing strong emotions. It’s that emotions take control of your behavior, attention, and decisions. This can affect:
Chronic emotional dysregulation often develops as the brain’s attempt to help and protect us when the systems that help us pause, understand feelings, and choose a response are repeatedly under strain.
For some people, the problem begins as early as childhood. For others, it grows gradually through chronic stress, sleep problems, learned patterns, thinking habits, or other environmental factors, which we’ll get into below.
Sleep does more than stop us from feeling tired. It helps the brain judge emotional information accurately and keep reactions in proportion. Poor sleep weakens the brain’s emotional “brakes.”
This is because sleep-deprived people are shown to have stronger activity in the amygdala – the part of the brain involved in detecting emotional importance. Weak communication between this area and the prefrontal cortex can mean less control over emotional reactions.[7]
In a study of 151 children aged eight to thirteen, weaker working memory and impulse control were connected with greater emotional dysregulation, particularly among children with ADHD.[8] This could explain why someone knows they should pause during an argument but finds it extremely difficult to do so once their emotions rise.
Some people may also be born with traits that make emotions harder to manage. A study of 304 pairs of three-year-old twins found that both genes and individual life experiences contributed to differences in emotional regulation and working memory.[9]
And a larger study of twin pairs also found genes partly influence emotion-regulation methods, including hiding feelings and changing how you think about or perceive a situation or event.[10]
Children learn what to do with emotions by watching how adults respond to them. Research specifically applying this to emotional regulation found that, among 80 parents of teenagers, parents who had difficulty managing their own emotions were more likely to dismiss, punish, or ignore their teenager’s feelings. The invalidation of emotions by parents is linked to greater emotional dysregulation in adolescents.[11]
Childhood adversity is also linked with difficulty managing feelings as well as greater use of habits like rumination and emotional suppression.[12] In other words, early danger is shown to leave the emotional system more alert.
AMFM is here to help you or your loved one take the next steps towards an improved mental well-being.
The good news is that if you experience chronic emotional dysregulation, your symptoms can improve. The goal is not to become calm all the time. Instead, the aim is to feel emotions without being ruled by them. The following are some evidence-based methods that can help.
Psychotherapy is also known as “talk therapy,” and it is the gold standard treatment for emotional dysregulation. Chronic emotional dysregulation often follows a repeated sequence, and rather than only discussing what happened after an outburst or shutdown, a therapist may help you examine:
Here are some forms of talk therapy that could be helpful:
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one of the first protocols for managing chronic emotional dysregulation. It helps you notice emotions without immediately judging them, consider alternative explanations, and more.
The good news is that a review of treatment studies found that emotional dysregulation significantly decreased after effective psychological treatment in nearly all studies reviewed.[13] This is a great reminder that chronic emotional dysregulation, while difficult, is not fixed and can change with help.
Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is an effective treatment for emotional dysregulation. It teaches four main skill areas:
DBT is especially known for helping people who feel emotions intensely and then struggle with impulsive behaviors, relationship conflict, self-harm, or crisis patterns. But the skills can also help with anxiety, depression, and trauma responses.
DBT research found that after therapy, participants reported greater use of behavioral skills, stronger mindfulness, and more belief that they could influence their reactions. They also reported lower emotional dysregulation.[14]
Emotion regulation skills help you work with emotions instead of being governed by them all the time. The goal is not to block sadness, anger, fear, or shame. It is to:
Working with a therapist can help you talk through and learn how to put these skills into practice, but let’s take a look at a few of the skills here:
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Chronic emotional dysregulation can make life feel constantly overwhelming and out of your control. If you’re struggling with this, AMFM (A Mission For Michael) Mental Health Treatment is here to support you.
We offer an intimate, focused mental health treatment experience for adults in home-like settings that are carefully maintained to be peaceful, comfortable spaces. AMFM Mental Health Treatment provides the full spectrum of care, including residential treatment and multiple levels of outpatient treatment. Our team of expert clinicians believes in treatment persistence so you can achieve lasting, life-changing outcomes.
Treatment programs at AMFM Mental Health Treatment are centered on understanding what drives emotional dysregulation and helping you build the skills you need to recognize escalation earlier, reduce impulsive responses, and recover more effectively after difficult moments. The aim is not to remove emotion, but to help you feel it without losing control of what happens next.
Our locations in California, Minnesota, and Virginia accept insurance and are in-network with most major providers. To check your insurance coverage for mental health care, simply complete our confidential online verification form or call us at 866-478-4383.
Reach out to us if you would like to start the admissions process or learn more about how we can help you experience a calmer, more fulfilled life. Our compassionate team is available 24/7 to answer your questions and provide guidance with no obligation.
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